Van and the Missing Papayas
by dark-side-of-dreams
Summary: Pure humor and randomness. It's vacation time for the Guardian Force. Some Thomas bashing, but it's all good fun. Takes place in Zoids: Guardian Force. I'll try to keep foul language out, but so far nothing really bad. I am currently editing so bear with
1. Chapter 1: In which plans for a vacation

This was posted a long time ago(In fact I barely remember writing it). So I have decided to go back and edit and update it. Considering how horrible it was(i.e. spelling, grammar, sentence structure, FORMATTING... you name it it was here) you may have to wait a while for the other chapters with an eight hour shift tomorrow. I might not have time until Thursday to do it. Ahh the luxury of a day off. I'm also currently re watching the episodes (on episode 22 of Chaotic Century). If you read it before I hope you see this as a great improvement. 

Takes place during **Zoids: Guardian Force** or the second season of **Zoids: Chaotic Century **depending on how you viewed the series.

Disclaimer: I don't own Zoids that bliss belongs to some one else, but I'll buy it for ten dollars if its up for sale.

_italicizes _means either thoughts or emphasis depending on context.

Example:

Emphasis: "I _hate _you," she yelled.

Thoughts: _Will he ever know I love him_, she thought dreamily.

Okay, here is the story. Enjoy:

**Van and the Missing Papayas**

_Chapter 1: In which plans for a vacation are discussed, there is an argument, and Fiona is the master of everyone._

>

It was a bright sunny day on Zi. The Guardian Force was trying to find a place to relax for a while to take their mind off of work. They sat around a table in silence trying to figure out where to go.

"Maybe we shouldn't take a vacation just yet. After all Raven, Reese, and Hiltz are all still at large and we could do with some more training," said Van .

"But Van, you guys have been working so hard lately. If you don't take a break soon you'll just explode with all the stress," argued Moonbay.

"Oh no! Van, I don't want you to explode," Fiona shrieked, her eyes widening in shock.

"I didn't mean they would actually explode, Fiona. You must really be under a lot of stress if you think that could happen," she sighed.

"I'm pretty sure stress doesn't have anything to do with it," Irvine muttered quietly. Too bad he didn't say it quietly enough though.

"Hey, that's not a nice thing to say about Miss Fiona. It's good that she takes everything so seriously. At least some one does. Now apologies!" yelled Thomas, jumping to his feet.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry Fiona." said Irvine leaning back in his chair.

"Say it like you means it!" he shrieked.

Irvine let out an exasperated sigh, "Sorry Fi...wait why do I have to say sorry. Moonbay started it."

"Hey I was just reassuring her that you guys wouldn't explode. Stop twisting it around, Irvine"

"If you hadn't..."

"Enough." shouted Fiona (Mood swings are murder). She stood up to get all of their attention, as Thomas dropped back into his seat in fear. The room quieted. "Now we are getting a little off subject aren't we. Who's got an idea of where we could go for our vacation?" No one answered. She sat back down. A long silence followed.

Twenty agonizingly, boring, minutes later.

"Hey, I got it!" Shouted Van, as he sprung up from his seat, making every one jump.

"Huh? Wha?" mumbled Irvine waking up from his nap- uh I mean... waking up from his intense thinking session.

"I said:_ I got it_."

"Oh." pause "Got what?" said Irvine still half a sleep- uh I mean coming out of his.. oh screw it he was asleep.

"Where we should go for our vacation, idiot." he said

"Oh that." replied Irvine, yawning.

One impatient minute later:

"Well are you going to tell us or are we going to have to read your mind?" asked a frustrated Thomas.

"Huh?" said Van. He had slipped in to a daydream about Fiona (**ADD any one**). "Oh, the vacation, almost forgot," he said with his trademark dopey grin spread across his face and his nervous laugh.

"So where are we going to go?"

"Papaya Colony" he said, clapping his hands together happily.

"What? What kind of a vacation is visiting Papaya Colony?" said Thomas slightly annoyed at the thought.

"Wha-What - k-kind - of - a - _v-vacation_?" stuttered a very shocked Van; suddenly becoming more stern, "the best damn vacation _ever_. I remember when I was five my dad took me there with Maria. It was great. That was the first time I ever tasted a papaya. It was the greatest day of my life," he reminisced.

"Excuse me!" replied Fiona sternly.

"Oh apart from the time I found Zeke," he noticed the look on Fiona's face "...and met you, Fiona... he he," he added smiling and rubbing the back of his head nervously.

Fiona smiled happily, "I knew it meant a lot to you as well Van".

"Good. It's decided. We're going" said Van proudly

"What? We didn't agree on that," interjected Thomas.

"So? You guys didn't come up with anything. Papaya Colony wins by default," Van said.

"You didn't give us enough time to come up with anything," yelled Thomas as he jumped up.

"You had plenty of time to come up with a destination," said Van.

"No I didn't"

"Oh yeah I forgot your brain runs half the speed of mold." Van replied before bursting out laughing at his own joke.

"Take that back now." He growled

"No," Van said as he crossed his arms defiantly.

"Take it back now or _else_"

"Or else what?"

"Or else I'll..." Thomas' face screwed up in concentration as he tried to think up a response.

"That's enough" yelled Fiona. Causing the two arguing men to quiet and drop down into there seat. "Stop badgering him. If he keeps thinking this hard he'll have a stroke.(Thomas: _Fiona cares for my health _hearts surround him.) Now, we will allow Thomas to think of an idea, and if he doesn't come up with anything anyone likes, we will go to the Papaya Colony," silence," agreed?" she said through gritted her teeth. The two boys nodded. "Good!" her expression changing into a smile, "now Thomas, think of where you want to go."

"Ohh thank you Miss Fiona for this opportunity. I won't let you down," he said jumping up and taking her hands into his.

"That's nice Thomas. Now think, and don't hurt yourself," she patted his head sweetly.

"Yes Miss Fiona," he smiled, sitting down to face Van.

Two minuets later.

Van and Thomas had been having a silent staring contest for about one minuet and fifty-two seconds.

"Van!" yelled Fiona, "stop distracting Thomas. He's trying to think. You know it's hard enough for him already."

_Fiona really does care for me_, thought Thomas dreamily.

"He stared at me first," Van yelled, standing up. She glared at him and he sat down again. "God, she can be scary some times," he mumbled

"I heard that," she snapped as she seated her self in her chair. And again there was silence.

A minute and a half later.

Van was getting impatient. Now that he had thought of the Papaya Colony he wasn't going anywhere else, and waiting for Thomas to think of something was just wasting time that he could spend eating delicious papayas. So, he did what any impatient, rude, person would; he began lightly tapping his fingers on the table. Thomas looked up startled at the new noise, but glared when he saw who had made it. Van smiled at Thomas and did it again. He started to form a pattern tap-tap-tap- pause -tap-tap- pause -tap-tap-tap- pause -tap-tap ect. increasing in speed. Thomas' started cringing with every tap, his anger toward Van mounting, and he began to growl in frustration.

After 5 minutes of Van's tapping and Thomas' growling:

"I cant take it any more," yelled Thomas standing up, knocking over his chair in the process. "Fine we'll go to your stupid _Papaya_ Colony. Just stop the insane tapping," _Oh, my dear Fiona. I have failed you,_ he thought sadly.

"Hey Papaya Colony isn't stupid. Hello, it _has _papaya's," said Van jumping up to meet Thomas' eyes.

Moonbay and Irvine groaned in annoyance. "Van, stops picking fights. You got what you wanted, now be quiet," she said angrily.

"But he..."

"Enough," she yelled.

"But"

"I said ENOUGH," she said screaming at the top of her lungs. Van and Thomas sat down.

And so it was decided they were going to Papaya Colony for a vacation.

>

End of chapter one


	2. Editing: sorry

Sorry Still editing check back soon.  



	3. editing as well: sorry again

Still Editing i promise more soon  



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